Armchair Athlete

Here is my place, behind the big brick wall,
Watching silly boys play cricket.
They’re throwing, hitting and catching the ball.
Knocking and saving the wicket.

I could play much better than them you know.
I’ve talent and lots of learning.
I could teach them all how to run and throw
If this sun wasn’t so burning.

And look at the size of that wooden ball
It could give you a bloody nose.
If it hits me square I’m liable to fall
And ruin my new cricket clothes.

And all this fast running and this throwing
Just cannot be good for the heart.
And the wind through my hair would be blowing
And wrecking my near-perfect part.

So I stay safely behind this barrier
Watching all the foolish boys play.
Running after the balls like a terrier
Wasting their whole entire day.

It’s true, yes, they may get some real glory
It’s true that they may gain some fame.
But you never will hear their own story
For they’re playing for the coaches great name.

I really do not think it is worth it
To run all around in this heat.
If I play I may get tired or (worse) hit.
And watching is ever so neat.

Sans risk and sans effort, that’s how I play
Sitting with my clean Cricket-Book
I’ll just hold it here most of this hot day
And try very hard not to look.

Because sometimes there are things that I read
That probably should not be read.
That when cricket is in word but not deed
It’s a game without players and dead.

6 Responses to “Armchair Athlete”


  1. 1 jer March 27, 2007 at 1:13 pm

    Libel should be “liable”, unless I’m mistaken.

    “If it hits me square I’m liable to fall”

    Otherwise (heh), I love it. I should read up on cricket.

  2. 2 matthewcook March 27, 2007 at 1:37 pm

    ‘Twere I a real poet I’d claim that the typo was on purpose and I had some sort of deep, double meaning behind the libel/liable thing.

    But I’m no poet, I’m Matt the Dork who can’t spell to save his life. Woo hoo.

    Duly edited.

  3. 3 jer March 27, 2007 at 1:46 pm

    Heh. At first I thought it was intentional, but then I remembered what libel means… which didn’t work. :P

  4. 4 Jordan Webb March 27, 2007 at 8:47 pm

    So Matt, have you read in the news what happened with the Pakistani cricket team? First they lost to the Irish on St. Patty’s (that’s no typo!)day, and then in frustration they strangled their coach to death a couple days later. I would say that they are sore losers, but come on, the death penalty? Maybe it is better to stay in the rocking chair and watch…

  5. 5 Mel Bee April 1, 2007 at 1:59 am

    Well well the poet strikes again! Woot! The main reason for this post is to SHOUT OUT a very BIG and very LOUD salute to the one who is turning another year older April 1st!!

    That’s right… HAPPY BIRTHDAY MATTY COOKIE!

    A purple gorilla with balloons should be showing up any moment at your door to sing… if not, the thought was at least there! :o )

    Hope you have a wonderful celebration there dude!

    God’s richest blessings to you on this day as in every one He has granted you.

  6. 6 Todd April 2, 2007 at 5:51 pm

    Matt we miss you guys. In the most selfish ways too… Here is some verse for you for your birthday!

    There was a dear friend
    with adjara red,
    Who stole fair beauty,
    and over worlds sped.
    Long have the wind-ings
    whispered his coming,
    Long have the pray-ers
    departed daunted;
    Fallen to simple
    selfish, light requests
    For safety and peace
    security, rest.

    Forgive us dear friend,
    and help us to see
    That God is not tame
    His ways show his fame
    Whatever they be.


Leave a Reply




 

March 2007
M T W T F S S
« Feb   Apr »
 1234
567891011
12131415161718
19202122232425
262728293031  

The Stats

  • 3,781 hits and counting...

The world as it sees me…